Missive from FJ811
It takes a long time to get to Fiji which resides on the other side of the equator and the other side of the date line from Oklahoma. Our first leg passed rather uneventfully and quickly.
This ain’t no disco
It ain’t no country club either
This is LA!
LAX didn’t seem quite as scary the second time around but we also had about 5 hours to kill until we boarded the plane for Fiji. Boarding time was 10:30 p.m. PST which is 12:30 a.m. in Oklahoma. I was tired. I could not wait to get on board the plane so I could just go to sleep.
Our seats were towards the back of the plane so we were in the first group of passengers to board. I grabbed my pillow, snuggled down as best I could and went to sleep.
I’m not sure how long it was but I could hear a big ruckus ahead of us. I woke up to see this woman, who would be sitting two rows in front of us, freaking out because she didn’t know where she was going to put her “stuff”. Of course she had more bags than you are really supposed to carry on a plane but she looked at the row between us accusingly like it was their fault she had no place for her “stuff”.
She asked if she could put her “stuff” on top of theirs in the overhead bin. They said that was fine. She was loud. And whiny. She disturbed my peace. I just wanted her to sit down and shut up so I could go back to sleep.
As she scurried around putting one bag in a bin behind us and another in the cabin in front of us, her husband Dough, I mean Doug, just sat there like, well, he sat there like a lump of dough.
She finally sat down. Loudly. And then, somehow (poetic justice?) the overhead bin popped open and her stuff landed on her head. Now she’s crying. Loudly.
This is my third time flying Air Pacific*. If you haven’t had the pleasure, I recommend them. The flight attendants are lovely. Welcoming, friendly, helpful. The women wear flowers in their hair. Soon, Wendy Whiner was surrounded by three of them. One had brought her ice wrapped in a towel to put on her head. Another told her if she wasn’t feeling well and wanted to get off they could do that but it would take some time to sort out which bags were theirs. A third was asking if she felt okay. Oh the drama.
“I don’t feel well”, Wendy whined.
Meanwhile an entire 747 full of people was waiting for her to decide if she would get off the plane or if we could head out. She seemed happy with all the attention and chose to stay on board.
It was then that I realized the impact of where the Whiners were sitting. They were in the exit row. Yes, if there is an emergency with the plane Doh!, I mean Doug, and Wendy Whiner will be in charge of calmly and efficiently opening the exit door and ushering us off the plane. Yikes!
She’s sleeping and it’s quiet, but bumpy. I’m praying we have a safe landing and that we are able to get off the plane before we get behind her trying to figure out where she stashed all her “stuff”. I’ve had enough drama.
Note: Air Pacific reminds me a lot of how the big airlines like United and American were in the 70s. The flight crew really seems to care about your comfort and making sure you have enough water or whatever you need. They also serve full meals. If you have Air Pacific as an option on your trip you should choose them. We have flown all over the world on many different airlines and they are, by far, my favorite.
PS - Wendy got up after they announced that the plane was landing and pointed to her head and the flight attendants made her sit down as the captain had ordered. I guess they weren’t buying the drama anymore either. We did end up passing them on the way out of the plane because she couldn’t remember where she had stashed all of her “stuff”.